The You’ve Got To Be Kidding Show – now on CPAC!

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The Article

Watching the you’ve got to be kidding party’s convention on CPAC.

Noam Chomsky is giving a speech right now via video.

So that’s fun.  No word from Fidel Castro yet (but see below).  Apparently Karl Marx and Joseph Stalin are both manifestly dead.  So there’s that.

The NDP—they’re “social democrats” dontchaknow.

They had a speaker— Malalai Joya—who is a member of the Afghanistan parliament.  They praised her and gave her a standing-o.  Apparently the irony of her presence, her position in life, her current freedoms, her prospects for the future and that of her country…. was utterly lost on the mindless socialists present, just ahead of their vote this weekend to demand that Canada withdraw all its troops from Afghanistan, and effectively turn the country over to Taliban and al-Qaeda terrorists who will behead and stone to death Malalai Joya and the likes of her.

I still haven’t heard them admit that they’re socialists, bent on the elimination of capitalism as we know it and fighting for global socialism, as their NDP Constitution dictates.  They’re “social democrats” though, apparently, that’s for sure.

D’oh! Spoke too soon.  Mr. articulate-all-yer-Ts, the far-left socialist, Stephen Lewis got up to speak and declared:  “I’m a democratic socialist!”.

He said it like it was a positive.  Got a big applause.

He’s about the biggest most arrogant and pompous ass I’ve ever had the displeasure of listening to.

Then he went on and on and on lecturing the crowd about AIDS.  He went on about “a cream that is vaginally applied”.  So I perked up for a second simply on the basis that I remembered suddenly that it was a political convention, rather than last month’s liberal fest AIDS conference in Toronto starring Bill Clinton ‘n leftist friends, or the porno channel.

But while I was perked-up anyway, I waited for the Michael Coren-coined words, “stop fornicating”, but alas, they were not on his mind.  Our uppers (that’s the NDP!) want to find pharmaceutical and technological and dollars dollars dollars to treat AIDS as it pops up miraculously amazingly following fornication, rather than stop the problem at its roots.  But they are against finding technological solutions to greenhouse gas emissions, choosing instead to force all industrial capitalist countries to stop producing (and spending dollars dollars dollars on CBC ads to make people stop opening their fridge doors).

I told you Fidel Castro was not there—but Lewis did say he was in a Castro-like phase these days. That apparently had to do with his habit of lecturing his proletariat masses (my term) for hours on end.

Nowhere else could you say you were in a Castro-like phase, and get a cheerful nod from your audience.

So for my part, I went to get a beer because listening to Lewis was making me dumber by the second.

Joel Johannesen
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