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We WANT to be investigated!

“We created the commission—within minutes of the Auditor-General coming down with her report”.

I’m watching a news conference being broadcast right now on official state media in Canada. That’s what the stumbling and jittery Prime Minister, Paul (“we lead the world”) Martin, said just now. 

He was responding to opposition Conservative Party leader Stephen Harper’s threat that he’ll somehow force an election if the ruling Liberals don’t ensure that the official judicial inquiry into Liberal Party corruption, being run by Justice Gomery, keeps moving forward. 

Currently, former Liberal Prime Minister Jean Chretien’s lawyers are trying to get Gomery fired, claiming he’s impartial. 

We’re being led to believe that since the Liberals started the inquiry into their corruption, which is an inquiry into the biggest corruption scandal in the history of Canada involving hundreds of millions of taxpayer dollars and political interference and numerous other allegations, and they appointed a judge to run the inquiry into themselves, that means they’re honest and that they’ll do anything to keep it moving forward and finding more and more corruption committed by themselves. 

Harper’s insinuation is that Chretien and Martin are in cahoots in trying to stall or abandon the inquiry.  That’s not a far-fetched notion given that they’re both Liberals and their Party’s reputation is at stake, and they were both implicated in some way in the corruption scandal of the 1990s and early 2000s.

They’ve closed down ongoing inquiries before and in fact it seems they have a bit of a habit of abandoning inquiries whenever they start making the Liberal Party and its lieutenants look bad.  Harper said in a newspaper report, “In the past, the Liberals shut down inquiries when they got too hot – both the Somalia inquiry and the APEC inquiry.” 

But Martin claims Harper is just “blowing smoke” (the Prime Minister of Canada’s exact words).

“He got caught blowing smoke on the notwithstanding clause.  134 legal experts told us so,” our great Liberal Prime Minister said.  This, we’re all supposed to know without even asking, is in reference to Harper’s bizarre claim that the Liberals shouldn’t promote gay ‘marriage’ in Canada, and rather, they should defend traditional marriage. 

Intelligent readers will note that “gay marriage” and the “corruption inquiry” have entirely nothing to do with each other.  Yet Harper is the one who is “blowing smoke”, you see. 

Martin went on: “He’s got himself on the horns of a legal dilemma.  That’s why he’s doing this.”  Personally, I think Martin is the horny one. 

“He’s simply trying to shift attention away from him.” (Unlike Martin right at this moment, who called a news conference and shifted the focus to Harper and gay ‘marriage’).

Liberal nobody Scott Brison who wants to be leader of all the land someday if he ever grows up and decides what party he belongs to, got up to a microphone in the red sweater his mom gave him for the recent Tree Festivus and Celebration of Multicultural Diversity on December 25, and a pair of wrinkled slacks, to represent our government and inform us that Stephen Harper doesn’t understand the Charter of Rights, or the Constitution, or the laws of the country, so he said we should question whether he could lead the country, that being the case.

That sure squares up that corruption inquiry thing. 

Apparently Brison never got the memo about the election being over.  Liberals are always in election mode.  “Canada” is number five or six on their “most important” list though, after gay ‘marriage’, pot-smoking, inventing more social programs if that’s at all possible, and of course liberalizing all the land and appointing liberals to every post and position and inventing more and more. 

Then after the news conference, the state-run news media (in this case, “Newsworld”) repeated exactly what the Liberals said, in a lovely cordial chat between liberal experts (the anchor and a guest liberal), bona fide it all, agreed with it all, then went to commercial.  They did not ask any Conservatives any question at all whatsoever, simply talked about the Liberal party’s stance and how right they are.  The harshest criticism I heard was “they responded exactly as one could have predicted,”  or some intellectually self-satisfying nonsense like that.

After commercial, they went to a report about the Iraq elections, and how the violence is pretty darn bad.

Joel Johannesen
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