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Translation of Democratic Response To President’s SOTU Speech

Apparently President Bush’s State of the Union speech was not very important.  Apparently what is really important is what the Democratic response to President Bush’s State of the Union speech is.

I did not know that.

That’s what I’m gathering from all the liberal news media reports and talk shows last night and today and into tonight and for the next month or two. 

But now, already, after hearing 860 different versions of the Democratic Party responses from 9,276 BILLION Democrats, it’s easy to get confused as to what they’re saying.  Actually, that was the problem from the very first response—but it’s gotten worse and worse.

Luckily David Limbaugh has already written a handy translation of the Democratic responses for us all. 

One integral theme emerged from the Democratic response to President Bush’s State of the Union address: the party’s underestimation of the American people to solve their own problems and to see through liberal rhetoric.

Let’s just look at what they were really saying on the various issues once you strip away the generalities and euphemisms.

Religion and Values: We know that voters, not just those wacko fundamentalist Christians, are increasingly concerned about our culture’s rejection of traditional values and they’re voting Republican. We can fool the people into believing we’re values-oriented too if we start invoking the term—even if we use it to describe things that have never been considered “values,” as such. We’re also religious, and the less we show it, the more you should believe it.

Social Security: We understand that during the ‘90s we were describing Social Security as a crisis and ridiculed any Republican who would suggest otherwise. We never intended to tackle this problem, but it sure did get us some mileage in the presidential and congressional elections during the Clinton years. We are counting on the fact that people won’t remember, much less hold us accountable, for our 180 on this point today (anymore than they’ll remember we’ve advocated regime change in Iraq since the Clinton years)…

[…Read the rest!…]

Joel Johannesen
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