Poor liberal comedian/radiostar wannabe Al Franken’s nuance and all his non-lying “conservatives are wrong, dontchaseeit, dammit?!” approach of his just isn’t selling, as “Air America”, the fringe liberal-leftwing radio “network” he headlines—is failing, at least in rich, liberal California, where he’d be expected to do exceedingly well in terms of advertiser sponsorship if not also audience numbers.
But people are laughing at him more than with him, which is at least better than people not laughing, which is what he quit comedy to avoid. Well that and the fact that because he’s an entertainer, he thought that like all Hollywood entertainers, he owed it to America to talk politics and profess his great wisdom, anti-Bush style. That’s entertainment! Or at least it is to liberals.
Meanwhile, conservative radio star (actual star) Rush Limbaugh’s ad space is selling out in California—in that same market—and his audience is huge and growing all over America. (And then there’s the great Sean Hannity, Laura Ingraham, Bill O’Reilly’s radio show, and several others, all of whom are doing just fine everywhere, thank you).
So in the spirit of friendship, I offer this advice to Air America: MOVE TO CANADA! Air America is anti-American anyway, as is even more liberal-left Canada. Two peas in a liberal pod! And liberals are never afraid to run away like little girls when a fight’s at hand. And I know you liberals faked us out after your last election by pretending you’d be leaving conservative American and moving to Canada to avoid having to live in that Hell, but this time there’s cash money at hand. I know! Yummy!
And if they act fast, while the situation lasts, Air America could take advantage of the happy fact that the state-run CBC is all but shut down and suffering from a labor dispute currently (their new slogan: “we don’t report, you win!”), offering Air America an opportunity to get a leg-up on successfully competing against the state, as privately-owned radio and TV station owners have to do in Canada. (I’ve noticed that even CBC’s union journalist/employees have set up protest radio stations in state-run colleges, taking advantage of the rare opportunity to have half a chance at success while NOT having to compete against the state. The irony abounds.) But hurry, Air America! This offer can’t last! Conservative thoughts are leaking out everywhere, unchecked by state-run media, and the liberals are bound to put a stop to that!
Of course they’d have to call it “Air America Canada” much like “Food Network Canada” in the spirit of the successive Liberal Party governments’ forced “Canadian Culture” initiative which has been in the works for about 30 years now to absolutely no effect at all whatsoever, except that we now call Canada Notamerica.
And they’d have to include some Canadian content as prescribed and monitored and judged by the Liberals’ ingenious left-wing bureaucrat/censors in Ottawa—at least 35% worth—not because we want it but because “it’s good for us, you idiots who as you know cannot possibly think for yourselves, you stupid Canooks”. But not to worry: there’s always Antiques Roadshow-Canada! And I understand Bono and Michael Moore both qualify as Canadian content, as does Celine Dion, her American residency and entire reason-for-being notwithstanding. And naturally there’s always a Trudeau miniseries available, and plenty of anti-American documentaries from the state-run radio division of the Liberal Party, CBC’s “Radio 1”, or “Radio Canada”. Memo to Franken: Learn franÃ
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