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(6) Friday NewsQuips—July 10 2009

NewQuips are more than your average blog entry.  They’re fortified with quippiness.  Please take as directed.  Do not exceed recommended dosage.  Void where prohibited.  Not valid in Quebec.  The science is settled, the debate is over.  Come back often.  Give peace a chance.  The Liberals are the natural governing party. Michael Jackson was a genius.  Hope.  Change.  Yes we can.  I am the dancing queen.

1.  “Canadian jailed for supporting al-Qaeda”

A Canadian who left Toronto in 2000 to join Osama bin Laden’s al-Qaeda was sentenced to 7½ years imprisonment yesterday after admitting he had trained with and helped finance the terrorist group…

Ha ha!  Made ya say “terrorist”!  Let’s watch as the smarmy CBC reports this as an innocent “home-grown”, “Canadian” guy who helped finance the “so-called” terrorist group. 

…And of course here’s your countdown to Trudeau Junior, and every other Liberal, and Layton’s you’ve got to be kidding party minions, and the Bloc head and his Bloc Quebecois oui-men uniformly demanding that he be immediately released from the Americans, in 5…4…3…

1 (b).    … further to the above item (#1), this line from the article: 

Warsame was born in Mogadishu and schooled in India. At age 17, he fled Somalia for Rome. From there, he went to New York and then Canada, where he was accepted as a refugee.

A refugee from New York, in America, then.  And/or Rome, Italy.  A “refugee”.  I see. 

Vote liberal.  Continue this pattern. 

2.  “Canada snubs G8 emissions target”

They say it like it’s a bad thing, again.  How about this:  “Canada avoids being duped”, with the sub-head, “G8 on hysterical ‘man-made global warming’ crusade”. 

L’AGUILA, ITALY—The Canadian government refused yesterday to adjust its plan to combat global warming even though its objectives fall short of the new commitment from the G8 group of industrialized countries to slash greenhouse gas emissions by mid-century.

“Even though…”?!  Oh my goodness.  Even though.  Oh how they hate it when goose-steppers are out of step with the geese. 

But there’s more!

That made Canada one of the targets for criticism … Critics, from United Nations Secretary-General Ban Ki-moon to environmental lobby groups

Oh no!  Criticism!  Damn.  Not from the U.N.‘s Ban Ki-Moon, I hope!  Why he’s with the U.N.!  (Hey Ban Ki-Moon:  how’s that whole Iran thing going?  And your neighbors the North Koreans?  And Afghanistan.  And Sudan.  And Somalia.  And human rights in Saudi Arabia and Yemen.  And whaddup with Pakistan?  And your U.N. rapists in the Congo.  How that’s going?  Hello?  Ban Ki-Moon?  Heloooo?!)

And “environmental lobbyists”, you say?  Funny that.  Their lobbying is perfectly acceptable —they’re “environmental lobby groups”, thereby lobbying for the right things, if I understand correctly. Otherwise, if they’re, say, lobbying for tax breaks or for free enterprise, they’re like cancer or AIDS (or Christians!) and should be banned.  In much the same way, liberals in Canada hate and refuse to allow private medical clinics, which they’ve ensured are against the law, and they shut them down, and they sue them and protest against them and generally just hate them…. except private abortion clinics alone, which they adore and accept and embrace and protect and promote and allow. 

I snub liberals.  “Even though” that will garner me some critics like Bob Rae and the CBC. 

3. CBC headline:  “Global economic problems unsolved: Obama”

Translation from the liberal-left to plain English:
Obama’s (and the others’) “stimulus” programs (stimulus is from ancient Keynsian and Marxism meaning government tax and spend, and government-growth, social engineering, planning, and control projects) is an abject failure of historic, mammoth proportion, and we plan to introduce “Stimulus Two”. 

Synonyms:
· Bunkum, 
· We at CBC are liberal-left and Obama sycophants, 
· claptrap, 
· obfuscation, 
·  failure to come clean, 
· Duh, 
· d’oh.

4. Speaking of abortions of intelligence (and of that famous liberal-left “tolerance” and “equality” and “diversity” and “love of fellow man”, yadda…):  “Frankly I had thought that at the time Roe was decided, there was concern about population growth and particularly growth in populations that we don’t want to have too many of,” liberal Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg told Emily Bazelon of the New York Times

Question:  Is the liberal Justice Ginsberg just like the founder of the abortion mill operation Planned Parenthood, Margaret Sanger: a racists and a proponent of eugenics and population control through abortion?

Read more here:  Supreme Court Justice Ginsburg: I Thought Roe Would Help Eradicate Unwanted Populations Through Abortion.  Also read this, I dare you liberals:  “Abortion Parties? – When Abortion Becomes a Lark”.
UPDATE: This one is giving me a bad, shall we say, “late term” aftertaste, so I’m considering bumping it up to dedicated blog entry status.  Or I might abort that plan.  Can’t decide.  For example, does this blog entry make me look fat?

5.  On Friday, after a long week, it’s good that liberals can write their own comedy for me, and all I have to do is point at it, press ENTER, and laugh.  Actually, TimesWatch.com does it for us all.  “Sotomayor’s Diabetes Struggle Is Heroic—But Gov. Palin Raising a Family Was Troubling”.  Or you could just read your local paper or watch the news.  Once you catch on, it’s really funny. 

6.  Related to item #4 above:  “Obama tells Benedict he wants to reduce abortions in U.S….”.  There goes the Sanger/Ginsberg liberal base vote. 

…Keep checking for added items…

 

Joel Johannesen
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