HOW LIBERALS THINK: Ottawa subsidizing penis search

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The Article


(my bolding)

Ottawa subsidizing penis search

Siri Agrell
National Post

Friday, October 08, 2004

A Toronto film company is using classified ads to search for “the perfect penis” as part of a documentary partially funded by the federal government.

Markham Street Films is producing a film called Penis Dementia: The search for the perfect penis, which will air next spring. Already the company is recruiting men willing to show off their endowment on camera and discuss the value of their family jewels.

“We are looking for a few good men who are willing to talk about and display their penises for a documentary. No pay but lots of exposure,” reads the advertisement in Toronto’s Now magazine and The Varsity, the University of Toronto’s student paper.

The response has been “tremendous,” said director Michael McNamara. “There’s been no shortage of people who are interested. I don’t know what it is, but from a very young age, boys like to show it off,” he said. “We’ve met some interesting characters.”

Two years ago, he and his partner, Judy Holm, produced a documentary for TVOntario called Flatly Stacked.

Flatly Stacked explored the “subculture and marginalization” of flat-chested women. It will air on Oct. 27 at 10 p.m.

Their new project received three separate grants totalling $133,750 from the Canadian Television Fund, one for each of the channels that will air the documentary: the Discovery Health Channel, the Life Network and Canal Vie.

Mr. McNamara said the CTF, which is partly funded by the federal government, is interested in productions that can be sold outside of Canada.

“One of the things they tend to look at with these things is will it get viewership and also will we be able to sell it outside of the country,” he said. “We’ve sold a French version and we’ve sold it in Australia, even before it’s made.”

Flatly Stacked has been sold to networks in the Netherlands and Scandinavia, he added.

The penis documentary, which will wrap filming in a month, is intended to be a funny and lighthearted film that will discuss a number of health and body-image issues.

The filmmakers interviewed numerous experts, including urologists; Dr. Robert Stubbs, a Toronto-born medic who performs penis elongations; and a Peterborough, Ont., couple who make dildos at their Happy Valley Dildo Company.

During interviews with men who answered the advertisement, Mr. McNamara and his staff asked questions on a number of topics including “the top 10 places you should never put your penis.”

“Blender,” Mr. McNamara named as the number one answer. “I don’t know where that came from.”

? National Post 2004

Joel Johannesen
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