Employer: Workers, please strive to go from bad to average. Workers: No way!

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The Article

This tangent is a sequel to my blog entry just posted, which speaks to the power of the people in wrecking the narrative advanced by the liberal-left and/or their mainstream media division. I am rejoicing today in how these good citizens (a word so good, by the way, that it has been banned by the left-wing progressive nitwits in Seattle, Washington) have become more and more adept at blasting holes in the liberals’ memes, and that of their media. The fun part is that they’re using the mainstream media’s own web space to do it. Which is why I love the internet.

But it gets even more fun. The article is about how a union is battling against one of the icons of European-style socialism, IKEA. It is unwittingly mocking, in practical terms, how both of them are failing  — at least failing to make sense.

This news article comes with a handy bonus fold-out dumbspakenbild. It reveals some of the bizarre, almost embarrassing thinking of today’s labor unions. I may be a nincompoop, but I bet lots of IKEA’s union members would shed their union membership and join the ranks of real-world, performance-based normality; and they can see the success easily available to citizens (ok Seattle-folk  — the people) in the absence of unions. For these people. the simple solution to ending this IKEA strike  —  and the key to higher earnings and a better job  —  is to eliminate the union.

The fun bit is that the union in this case is the union representing IKEA workers. IKEA has always been carefully crafted and packaged and then assembled by the Left as a shining scion of European-style socialism. For its part, the union is, apparently, posing as that infamous, confusing, IKEA assembly instruction sheet, which makes no sense. And then it’s all printed-up in a very progressive-lovin’ media outlet, which usually poses as an instruction sheet for progressive-spokentürd.

 (My highlighting)

Rejected IKEA offer spoke to inefficiencies, company says


VANCOUVER — The Globe and Mail

Last updated

The offer most recently tabled by IKEA in an ongoing labour dispute with employees at its Richmond, B.C., location addressed the unionized members’ primary contract concern and would have positioned the store for future sustainability, according to the company.

Teamsters Local Union 213 recently rejected the offer – which would have guaranteed employees a 2-per-cent increase annually and up to an additional 6 per cent if the store met annual sales targets – after three days of mediation over a two-week period. The union found the targets to be “unrealistic,” said member Dorothy Tompkins, noting they are significantly higher than the store’s typical sales.

However, the company maintains that a sales target of $30-million more over a six-year agreement is reasonable for the store, which it says has consistently been the lowest-performing in Canada while having the highest staff costs.

IKEA Richmond’s productivity is 30 per cent below Canada’s highest performing store, in part due to the allocation of guaranteed hours and a “lack of efficiencies and flexibility” in the expired collective agreement, said IKEA spokeswoman Madeleine Lowenborg-Frick…

The company is asking the Richmond store to go from being the lowest performing in the country to seventh out of 12, Ms. Lowenborg-Frick said.

No! says the union. We refuse to be encouraged to be barely half-ass instead of staying at the bottom!

It’s almost funny. I say almost because alas, it’s real life and the fact is, this is really just absolutely common union-think. Worse, it’s the sort of “thinking” that prevails in the enormous government or public-sector unions too. For example, teachers’ unions are dead against performance-based job security or salaries, and are therefore against testing and rankings as put out by the venerable Fraser Institute. And therefore, people today can’t read or write. But teachers and their unions are cool with that. At IKEA, they might call this a stupitcrap. But they still sell it anyway.

And here’s where plain old citizens (or people of unidentifiable or unimportant national credentials) come in:


7:28 AM on August 7, 2013

Sounds like ikea is being quite reasonable. All the employees have to do is rise from bottom of the barrel to middle of the pack–and they get an 8% increase (2% + 6% bonus)! If they don’t–they still get 2%. Most of us would love 8% increases for being hopelessly average. And 2% for being worst of the pack? Come on! If that’s not a good enough contract, you deserve to be unemployed because clearly even simple math is beyond you.


12:17 PM on August 7, 2013

Actually 7th out of 12 is still below average and they are the highest paid. They should get nothing unless they pull themselves up to average while being paid the most. Their highest paid workers after 4 years get almost $29 an hour for a retail job.

Cry me a freekin’ river.

IKEA-start_the_car(300px)Or as the IKEA ad says, “Start the car!!” Because the union is getting away with theft.

And now I’ll tangent again, because the liberals can’t stop me! I’ve often advocated that politicians get paid based on how much the average self-employed entrepreneur is making  —  after tax. That’s an odd twist on performance-based pay scales, to be sure. But imagine the benefits to Canadians! Alas, politicians are (perhaps wisely) against that. After all, politicians have kids to send to private schools and medical tests and procedures to get done in the U.S., and they don’t shop at IKEA.

There is no love lost between me and IKEA, which I swore off of back when I discovered quality goods. To be as uncomfortable about IKEA and its sales woes at its Richmond, BC store as an IKEA chair is to sit in, I’ll venture a guess here. If I understand correctly, Richmond was Canada’s first IKEA store which is still standing, opening back in 1976. It has taken this long for the folks of BC’s lower mainland to figure out that a lot of, or even most of, IKEA’s stuff… is junk. Its made out of something just barely thicker and sturdier than cardboard  —  and actually, some of it is cardboard. It’s little more than a temporary Hollywood set stock. And their credo seems to be “make it uncomfortable, workers, for our goal is to make our chairs hard on the ass.”


Joel Johannesen
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