Doug Giles’ latest column (in the columnist section) continues the theme he started last week about how to ruin your life in ten easy steps. Many victims (you know who you are!) already know most or all these steps but this is for people who are still unsure of how exactly they can ruin their lives effectively. It’s really easy!
Here’s the ten steps:
1. Be a slacker.
2. Blame others.
3. Embrace hopelessness.
4. Follow others mindlessly.
5. Be a wet blanket.
6. Hang out with morons.
7. Be a self obsessed me-monkey.
8. Stand for nothing.
9. Have an “it’s not my job” mentality.
10. Quit when the going gets tough.
Here’s a snippet from his column:
Another way to assure that you never get a life is to continue to blame others for why you haven’t accomplished anything yet. [Losers love this lecture.] A must in developing The Disaster Master Mind ? is to convince yourself that your sad lot in life is because “they,” “them,” and “the other guy” have all conspired against you. Yes, you have to believe that others have wronged you, and they . . . they are the reason why you’re an unemployed cross dresser who keeps human body parts in your refrigerator.
Blame shifting is a non-negotiable if you want to lock in The Disaster Master Mind ?. For those finding it hard and somewhat silly to affix blame on others, let me assist you. Try this: If you had a rough childhood, or possibly were even rejected in the womb, then magnify that and milk it for everything it’s worth and use it to have people forever pity you and never expect anything from you. See how easy you can take something other people have done to you and use it to opt out of life? [Craving perpetual pity is also a good thing to add to your jacked-up arsenal. That’s a freebie!]
PTBC was founded by Mr. Johannesen in 2000.
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