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Promises, promises promises

Desperate Martin lays it on thick

The look of growing desperation in Paul Martin’s face is perhaps matched only by the growing number of the priorities the embattled prime minister has promised to deliver on.

When I started pondering putting this insightful column together as I hopped on the LRT, Martin was up to 56 major promises, but by the time I hit the office, he had added killing one of his own much-lauded endeavours—the $975 “landing fee” for new immigrants.

Then came his off-the-top pledge to rescind the Constitution’s notwithstanding—opting-out—clause.

With that, he has promised to hand over the nation to a bunch of unelected judges. Members of Parliament will become just flunkies. Incidentally, with that one he’s also undermined whatever sagging Liberal fortunes still existed in Quebec.

Right on top of that curve, came his out-of-this-world vow to lead the world in the de-weaponization of space.

Perhaps the shipping tycoon’s brain is now so waterlogged he doesn’t know there are no weapons in space, only satellites to look down on Earth and prevent surprise attacks on our western democracies. Does Martin want to strip away this safety shield?

Add to that, in anything involving space, Canada has to piggyback on American endeavours.

Since the Jean Chretien/Paul Martin cabal has ruined our relationship with the administration of President George W. Bush, Washington is going to co-operate with Martin on this sci-fi charade about as much as it co-operated with him on the softwood lumber dispute.

Recall when Martin was the man who was going to restore our relations with the U.S. after Chretien’s outlandish behaviour, only to switch to America-bashing himself when he felt it might haul in a few votes into the Liberal nets?

OK, OK—when it comes to the immigration landing fee and the marriage issue, let’s admit the shipping tycoon has backtracked on any number of his political principles over the years, marriage being strictly between a man and a woman being one—but now it seems he’s willing to toss anything and everything overboard if it might keep the Liberal ship stay afloat.

Incidentally, I hear a lot of frightened crew members on the Liberal ship, seeing how it’s headed for the shoals, are already grabbing life jackets and jumping overboard. There are even rumours of mutiny in some Liberal quarters.

Yes, the Grit hull is rusting out, pulling in water, and leaking voters almost quicker than the Titanic.

So, talk about being lost at sea, this sailor is going to end up swabbing decks if he isn’t careful. With, one hopefully anticipates, any number of defeated Grit MPs.

Conservative Stephen Harper has steadily set the course, he’s honestly set out five key priorities—from tough ethical rules for government to cutting the GST to 5%—which surely are do-able.

No one doubts Harper can deliver on five promises, and let’s recall in 12 years Martin never delivered on his much championed promise to kill the GST. So you can’t deliver on one simple, straightforward promise in 12 years how can you deliver on 60-or-so promises?

It’s all pie-in-the-sky and smoke-and-mirrors stunts for the hopefully naive voter. Fortunately, as polls show, there are fewer and fewer naive voters these days. One guesses when the vise starts relentlessly closing in and defeat stares him in the face rational behaviour collapses.

Only a hefty supply of tranquilizers can likely calm Martin down. You know, the kind they give to a fellow whose about to walk up the steps to the gallows, or in Martin’s case, walk the plank into shark-infested waters.

That’s why we now have a slew of TV attack commercials on Harper, commercials so distorted if Martin were in the retail business he’d be charged with false advertising.

The heat in the cabin kitchen must be getting extremely hot for one of Canada’s foremost tax haven specialists to be sweating like this.

Yet now, having lost direction absolutely, Martin just keeps adding priority on top of priority and hopes he’ll catch some lost voters with each new promise.

Friends, it’s a Mad Hatter’s tea party down at Liberal party headquarters, even though Lewis Carroll’s March Hare isn’t actually due on the scene until more than a month after election day.

The bell really is tolling now, and it couldn’t toll for a more deserving skipper.

No safe harbour, ahoy.

 

Paul Jackson
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