[dropcap]S[/dropcap]o much CBC nuttery.

The Globe & Mail’s guy who sits on the couch all day and watches TV — mostly CBC, if we are to take him at his word about the importance of it to humankind, preaches the same old CBC line. Yes it’s a repeat.

It’s time for another episode of  “Canadians Are Rightly Questioning Having a State-Owned Taxpayer-Funded Media Behemoth Like the CBC, and are Getting Slammed as Wretched Cranks in the National Media for Doing So.”  It’s a sitcom in the North Korean genre.

The ideas about the CBC being put forth by Conservative leadership candidates Kellie Leitch (whose model I agree with) and Maxime Bernier, are summarily deemed by the Globe & Mail’s official expert to be “horse manure” — insulting and yet queerly anodyne language he might have picked up on CBC TV in the late 1950s.

But to Doyle, it’s “horse manure,” in exactly the same way as “the screening-immigrants thing” is. Which pretty much proves he’s a CBC watcher. His whole column mixes his alt-left politics and his loved for the state-owned media. Just like the CBC does! No wonder he loves it.

Alt-left aside for a moment, why such language restraint? On the hipster state-owned CBC they go right ahead and say “shit” anytime they want. Does Doyle not get that their sitcom “Schitt’s Creek” is an ever-so folksy play on the word Shit? And the libertine envelope-pushing goes on and on at the CBC all day long: they don’t shy away from showing full frontal nudity and showing videos about waxing one’s balls (yeah I mean young men’s testicles) and pickles coming out of a girl’s ass. Talk about shit!

All of that CBC fare on the state-owned media is just fine with Doyle — it’s Leitch’s position on the CBC that he finds “shameful and an embarrassment” — missing the irony completely, possibly because he’s clueless.

Leitch and Bernier are clueless. Television is the most important, influential storytelling medium of our time.

Huh? I don’t think Leitch or Bernier want to cancel television. This is like trying to argue the importance of toe jam by stating as your opening premise the ever so controversial argument that the human body is the most important and influential toe jam medium of our existence. We don’t want to eliminate human bodies. It’s the confounded toe jam that concerns us. Nobody likes it.

During his post-U.S. election hangover, Doyle reported on November 9 that nobody was watching the CBC:

Meanwhile, over on CBC, Peter Mansbridge was dozily complimenting Adrienne Arsenault on the trees near the White House that acted as a backdrop to her report. Not that anyone cared about CBC coverage.

It may also be worth mentioning that the CBC isn’t just the toe jam of television — it’s also all over the radio, satellite radio, and all over the internet.

Doyle seems to suddenly remember we’re only talking about cutting the CBC and not all of television, and then becomes unhinged (my bolding):

The idea that CBC television and radio is a frivolity, sucking up vast amounts of money to make bad TV and irrelevant radio, is the position of a small number of well-off cranks in Toronto and Montreal, aided by a number of other cranks who, one imagines, stave off personal wretchedness by ceaselessly pointing out that the CBC gets funding to make TV and radio, while they don’t.

Well that turned ugly quickly. So guess what, we’re all just a goddamn basket of… cranks, who are all trying to “stave off [our] personal wretchedness.” There goes his language restraint. Let me be an “important storytelling medium” for you:

wretchedness

wretch·ed (rĕch′ĭd)

adj. wretch·ed·er, wretch·ed·est
1. In a deplorable state of distress or misfortune; miserable: “the wretched prisoners huddling in the stinking cages” (George Orwell).
2. Characterized by or attended with misery or woe: a wretched life.
3. Of a poor or mean character; dismal: a wretched building.
4. Contemptible; despicable: wretched treatment of the patients.
5. Of very inferior quality: wretched prose.

[Middle English wrecched, from wrecche, wretch; see wretch.]

wretch′ed·ly adv.
wretch′ed·ness n.

Move over Hillary Clinton, you’ve been trumped — pun intended — by an even bigger, more insulting, more out of touch, elitist, bigoted ass than you. And like you, he’s the opposite of Donald Trump. Hilariously, it’s John Doyle, in his other capacity as a smug, condescending left-wing political guru, who advises — as if in Bizarro World — to all the misguided, unlike him:

If they’d all paid attention to the reality-TV dynamic used by Donald Trump to win an election, they might not have woken up one recent morning in puzzlement about how and why Trump was the president-elect.

Right back atcha. I wasn’t in puzzlement, I was still drunk with happiness. But then I don’t watch the CBC if at all possible, and I do watch Fox News Channel, so that might explain that.

The John Doyles of the world are people in a liberal-left bubble so tight they have no idea that this following bit makes no sense to most Canadians:

Understanding it and why it has impact is rather necessary information to have, prior to denouncing any area of it. In the specific matter of CBC TV, to cite one example, Kim’s Convenience is not forgettable, irrelevant, or badly made; nor is it, in Bernier’s phrase, an example of “bad Canadian copies of popular American shows.”

What’s “Kim’s Convenience?” The basic proposition about being “forgettable” is that you know what the thing is in the first place.

I had to look it up. Kim’s Convenience is a CBC TV show (also on the state’s YouTube Channel). It’s another vital sitcom. (Thank you benevolent government for the vital state laughs!)  It’s the story of the Kims, a Korean-Canadian family, running a convenience store in downtown Toronto.

Episode #1: entitled “Gay Discount.”
Description: “after being accused of homophobia, Appa decides to offer a store discount to gay customers during Toronto Pride Week.”

[Fake shockface]

Of course you deplorables hicks in the small towns outside of the enlightened Toronto, Ottawa, and Montreal is who this is really for. And you love it so, so much. To wit:

Outside of Toronto, Ottawa and Montreal, the CBC is a vital presence, providing local coverage and Canadian content, which, though diminished, is vastly appreciated by residents of cities big and small and in rural areas.

Except that it isn’t. Reason number 146 for nixing the state-owned CBC is: “Nobody watches the CBC.” (146-B: “Root cause: Because it’s horse manure”).

Doyle’s bottom line:

Dismantle it or reduce it to the begging-bowl status of PBS and all of that is gone.

All of what?

But Doyle explains it so well here:

You have to live in the bubble of the well-off establishment to be blind to the CBC’s importance.

So I’m part of the well-off establishment. I did not know that. Actually, it’s struggling taxpayers who fail to see why we should fund something so irrelevant. I’d say nice try, but it wasn’t even.

Doyle’s own bottom line about the CBC came directly out of his bottom. By which I mean it’s full of shit. Human shit. This I learned by watching other channels and having a clue.

 

State-owned media — and all state-owned business in which the state competes against its own citizens — should be banned in this country, and that notion should be enshrined in the constitution.