Bare-Ass Bob Rae and Ralph Goodale form an a cappella boy band! “The Measured Tones”

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The Article

Conservatives are meaniepants!  So say the Liberals, this morning, on their state-owned, socialism-reliant CBC.  It’s news! 

Bare-Ass Bob RaeYes, the progressive-left’s very own state-owned news channel presented us with this new boy band, this morning, starring of a couple of Liberals denouncing a speech made by the Conservative minister of finance, Jim Flaherty, yesterday.  Da word on the street is dat one of dair fist big hits will be “Pants on the Ground”, featurin’ Bare-Ass Bob Rae of course (as seen at left, bare-assed, on a previous CBC show). 

Their name (“The Measured Tones”) notwithstanding, the new boy band (Liberals Ralph Goodale and the Liberal pip known as Bare-Ass Bob Rae) is apparently in brain-poo-oozing high dudgeon today, simply over one of their rivals — no no, not the Back Street Boys or Lady Gaga— but rather Conservative finance minister Jim Flaherty and his speech yesterday, in which he apparently engaged in … get ready for it…. partisanship

Partisanship.  Yup.

Oh shudder.  The scandal.  The humanity.  Dear. God.  Partisanship, you say.  From a Conservative finance minister.  Somebody contact the authorities.  Possibly the “Human Rights Commission” division of the Left.  Get Layton on the horn.

If history dictates, the CBC’s Don (“the spin stops here! —Hi Bill!”) Newman and other CBC opinion-writers will immediately begin calling this “Conservative partisanship-Gate”, no doubt.  Because (A) they are compelled to by mysterious unknown forces and (B) “that’s what it’s called.” (See historic context)

So to remedy the partisanship bugaboo, The Measured Tones were given approximately two hours (seemed like it anyway) of free air time on state TV news to broadcast their news of what could possibly be the words to an upcoming hip-hop song “Da Neo Cons—Dey’s Big Fat Meaniepants, What?”, by the new boy band, accompanied by visiting leader Michael Ignatieff.  Rumors are swirling about Ignatieff’s own hit, “I’m a Purdy l’il Puffin Birdy”, being featured on the The Measured Tones’ first eight-track album. 

Here’s a sampling of just SOME of the actual words and other verbiage used by Liberal MP Ralph Goodale, supplemented by the pip, fellow Liberal MP Bare-Ass Bob Rae, this morning.  These are in order.  Note the crescendo of hate!:

·  ludicrous performance

·  counterproductive

·  downright stupid

·  pathetic

·  reduced to such a degrading spectacle

·  abusive diatribe

·  reform alliance coalition

Ralph Goodale of “The Measured Tones”, in this screen capture at the exact moment he completed his new hip-hop song called “Rage Against The Conservatives”.  He looks extremely satisfied with himself as he raises his chin and looks down his nose at Canadians.

·  reform coalition that… ignores … Canadians families

·  no time for the concerns or interests of ordinary… Canadian families

·  degrading pit bull

·  pathetic spectacle

·  lack of values of this government

·  no tactic which they will not stoop

·  it’s a dangerous thing

·  it’s bizarre

·  no rational explanation

·  reduced to juvenile trivia

·  nothing important to say

·  joining the bottom-feeder crowd

·  he’s degraded the currency

·  [that text was] not written by any serious person

·  brutally partisan (IRONY?  —Joel)

·  there is no coalition in this country that offers any THREAT or RISK to Canadians except for the reform coalition.

·  (Rae:)  Flaherty gave a very partisan speech!

·  spoil the atmosphere

·  partisan trivial pathetic nonsense

·  these guys [the Conservatives!] just swirl down their cesspool of trivial games

·  (Rea, French:) personal and partisan attacks by the Conservative Party … purely partisan … just to cause problems

·  (Rae:) [Flaherty’s speech] wasn’t exactly the most subtle of presentations … this kind of nonsense … I think he struck out

·  He looked really… dumb…

Oh that last one …. what a gem.  It’s what you call a “boomerang”.  The fella throws it, and then, apparently unbeknownst to him, the thing flies back at him at twice the speed and hits him square in the ass.

Any sane person would have expected any news anchor to chime in with a festival of laughter at the level of hate and derision, contempt, hypocrisy, or if she wanted to suck up and be a groupie to the boys in the band, plain old irony contained within that performance.  But no.  It’s the CBC. 

The CBC news channel’s anchor, Suhana Meharchand, found utterly nothing remarkable about the demeanor of this dynamic duo and their cheap little insulting, derogatory, hate-fest.  She found no irony or hypocrisy in any of it, whatsoever.  She made absolutely no mention of the anger, the outlandish insults, the accusations, and the general super, hyper-negative tone that was just displayed by supposedly respectable, mentally tempered, and measured politicians, who, even while they were hyper-condescending to respectable Conservatives, demand a quiet, happy, centered, respectful and reasonable debate, and a friendly, respectful, Kumbaya atmosphere between all the Conservatives and all of the opposition left-wing progressives and socialists, at all times. 

Apparently partisan politics should only be allowed amongst leftists, especially when the Conservative is hitting all the right points and is pushing buttons among Canadians who mostly agree with the Conservatives.

But best of luck to The Measured Tones and their upcoming Uber Hypocrisy Tour.

Joel Johannesen
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